Saturday, August 11, 2012


My maid and I were having a conversation today, she cooks for us and I realised that she had a little more work than usual and I stood next to her and helped her out a little bit while talking to her. I asked if she wanted some tea and she was glad. We had not eaten the rotis she had made the previous day and I told her that we had no time to eat them. She laughed and said such is my story. "I cook everyday at home and I have two boys - boys are bad people. I make a good vegetable and they polish it off. They never think that I do so much work and get home. When I tell my 15-year old about this, he puts the blame on the younger one and the blame game continues. I miss my daughter, daughters are nice, they think about their mothers and fathers!"

It is funny how such sort of male behaviour translates into all kinds of relationships. It is extremely logical to know that there are 'x' number of people in the house and therefore all the 'x' need food.  I wonder what happens - do they have less observation powers or do they not learn for as long as they live? I forget that does not fit into their definition of logic! I have observed my grandpa, he is the most caring man I know, I am sure my grandma might have a different point of view, but I haven't seen anyone else as perceptive as him - my uncle runs a close second. So what exactly is this male logic which conveniently ignores normal, practical life?

Is it enough to gather information and spout it out at regular intervals, does that amount to logic? If you find that the government of 'x' country is unfair to its people, if a man can notice that, why can't he notice that he is unfair to his own daughter, sister, wife or mother in ignoring her human needs? Mother, out of her limitations due to the number of responsibilities at home, may not know what happened in Iraq today, but she knows that if she doesn't call her son for eating food at least 4 times, he will not eat on time. Wife may not know who the finance minister of the country is unless her husband tells her sometimes, because she is so busy figuring out how to be her husband's secretary, nurse, nanny, maid, teacher and be a partner!

I have observed that men come with an innate sense of competition - all wars in history have been because of men, because at different points of time some man wanted to prove his superiority over the others. This translates into all aspects of their lives. Most other men are used to it, because they want to prove something all the time, so men carry that into their relationships as well and when the relationship is with a woman, this aspect proves to be disastrous to the relationship. Usually a woman does not compete with people she loves (her family) and anyway her sense of competition is quite restricted - but she has other manifestations such as jealousy (which is a separate subject altogether).

 Food, clothing and shelter are accepted by all as the basic needs, then sometimes why does another person have to point out to a man that these basic needs are important, especially when he prides himself on being logical? Why do most men not know to cook? This is a basic, practical thing! So the conclusion is that the definition of male logic is 'gathering information' - X place is located here, Y who is important fell off a cliff, Z invested so much in S, but how to live life - which in fact requires logic, does not fit into male logic. Unfortunately since this world has been run by men for too long, 'information' is equated with logic, it is time to change that. Well if u can cram numbers in few seconds or solve cross word puzzles easily, you are welcome to be my secretary (nowadays that's an MBA). But if you can only do that and not see how a tree benefits you or how other human beings add value to your life, you are definitely not worthy of being called human.